Mr. Burns: Marge, what can we do?
Marge: Well, you could give them healthier snacks… theme days…
Mr. Burns: You mean like, “Child Labor Day?”
Marge: Mmm. Actually I was thinking of “Funny Hat Day.”
Grampa: Look what your bad egg of a son did to my teeth!
Homer: Dad, you and your stories. “Bart broke my teeth.” “The nurses are stealing my money.” “This thing on my neck is getting bigger.”
Marge: Now this is exactly what Bart’s teacher was talking about. Our son did something wrong and you look the other way.
Homer: But Marge, look at that hangdog expression. He’s learned his lesson. Let’s get him a present.
Marge: Homer, did you barricade the door?
Homer: Why? Oh, the zombies. No.